Fria Ligans forum

Hi!

Please use this thread to post feedback and report any typos or errors in Chapters 1, 3 and 4 of the Alpha PDF for The Electric State RPG. Please note:

• This is not the full game - the complete game will add three more chapters (2, 5 and 6) and expand chapter 7 a great deal. We estimate that the full game will have about twice the page count of the Alpha PDF.
• All page references are still marked "xx" in the Alpha PDF. Please do not report this - we fill fix all page references once the layout of the full book is completed.
• Before reporting an error, please check to see if it has already been reported. If so, don't report it again.
• For feedback on Chapter 7 (Into the Dust), please us the thread in the GM Only section.
• Please report your feedback no later than March 1.

Thank you!

On page 4, in the last sentence before the gameplay example, “interiority of the self each of you answer this” it feels like there is a missing punctuation mark between “self” and “each”.

On page 26, in the "Favorite '90s Song" table, the band Weezer's name is misspelled as "Wheezer" (item 62).

Page 6, last sentence of the third paragraph; “deer in the headlights or Armageddon”. “Or” should be “of”.

Page 6, section STRANGE EVENTS, first sentence: "…suspect of serving…" should read "…suspected of serving…”

Page 7, section A LINGERING HOPE, final paragraph, final sentence reads “…you need to careful not to let the bliss inside drawn you…” but should read “…you need to be careful not to let the bliss inside draw you…”

Page 20, under "Health and Hope", first paragraph, line 2. "They country’s dying" should likely be "The country's dying" or "Their country's dying."

Page 69, in the “Riding Animals” square, there is a typo and it reads “Riding Aminals” instead.

Page 30, in the "Examples of Tension" box, under the example that starts "A secret." "Maybd you’ve built it up in your head." "Maybd" should be "Maybe".

Not sure if you're looking for grammar feedback as well as typos/spelling.

P4, paragraph 1: "Torn apart by a second civil war, all but a few Americans..." should be "Living in a country torn apart by a second civil war, all but a few Americans..." - the Americans themselves are not torn apart.

p4, paragraph 2: "Yet, full as are all the wonders of the virtual world..." is a weird construction. "Yet, as full of wonders as the virtual world is..." is better.