JohanR
Topic Author
Posts: 79
Joined: Tue 02 Mar 2021, 23:34

Feedback to monsters, strongholds and artifacts needed!

Fri 26 Aug 2022, 13:24

I'm currently rewriting Reforged Power. I have split it into one booklet for the Players and one for the Gamemaster.
And here are some proposed rules for Strongholds, Monsters and also some Artifacts:
https://1drv.ms/u/s!ArQCBq2tG7xajSMwdm- ... q?e=UqHEt2

This is far from all changes, but I though it could be good start to receive feedback on these for now?
Note that they have not even been proof read by me, so there will be MANY typos, bad sentances, etc.
I have too much to write, so I haven't really have had the time to go back and reread anything yet >.<

Feedback
can be written here or directly into the documents. I'm primarily looking for things like these:
1. Typos, bad sentences, etc. And propose better sentences, even if the sentence is okay, but could be changed for the better. Unless you object, I'll add all those that contribute to the credits!
2. Are the new Monsters, page 19 (page number 31), fitting? Should lore, etc be changed? Are some things to powerful or too weak?
3. The new monsters lacks monster resources. So ideas please! Well, actually the banshee and chimera have entries (see the first pages), but they could maybe be looked over. Also are other monster resources OK? Any other ideas? Bokvist gave some nice ideas. I also took Konungr's idea of stone leather from trolls. Will wait for the final version of Book of Beasts before I readdress those, but will for these mainly look at entries made by GRAAK in the other thread about that.
4. The Artifact chapter, is it OK? or should I scrap it? I would so very much like some help with fluff text here! New ideas are welcome as well.
5. Could you please list the worst parts with Reforged Power? I know it changes too many things. So I would gladly look into changing that. A lot of work has already been made (but not released yet), like removing pain, going back to Willpower Points being more in line with the original rules.. but with the option of having them move towards Empathy at the end of a session.

Crafting
Reforged Power made some rather significant changes to crafting. I am thinking of changing crafting talents back to what they are listed as in the PHB, but with slightly added bonuses, like a rank 2 Tanner, could know Taxidermy, etc. Not that I think my existing rules are particularly bad, it is just that again, they change to many core rules?

Then I if I keep the crafting talents as in the PHB, I could just add an optional rule:
Optional, Any ranks above the first in a crafting talent, could add a cumulative +1 bonus when crafting or repairing objects made with that talent, but if so any item masterwork bonuses works as a penalty when repairing such an item.
- So if the rule is used, then players will have an easier time crafting their own gear as long as they invest in higher ranks of their crafting talents. If they do not invest in talents, and relies on buying/stealing masterwork items, they instead have a penalty in that those weapons are harder to repair. Kind of a simple rule to boosts the value of getting the higher ranks in crafting talents?

As for materials they could all change to be more simple like:
Steel: If steel is used instead of iron when crafting an item, it reduces any penalty from making a masterwork by 2.

6. Do you agree, will this much lighter approach be better?

As for the "Book of Beast - Alchemy talent", here I will need to see the changes that are being made before I decide anything. What I will likley do:
Have the "Book of Beast - Alchemy talent" be renamed as "Apothecary". It will do the same or a very similar job, just better balanced. Poisoner will likley go back to keeping its own talent.
The "Reforged Power - Alchemy talent" will likley stay with the name "Alchemy".
Apothecary will be about how things affect the body, and Alchemy will be about changing the elements of the earth.
 
wickermoon
Posts: 12
Joined: Tue 30 Aug 2022, 00:41

Re: Feedback to monsters, strongholds and artifacts needed!

Fri 02 Sep 2022, 06:15

Whiners:
Page 19 -> Resources
-> "If eaten raw, it heals 1 point of lost Strength." The 1/one is missing.
-> "[...]however the Whiners seem to always die a short time after the procedure." the instead of they and seem instead of seems

Wyvern:
Page 30 -> Resources
-> "[...]that also counts as winter clothing" dropped the "if"


Banshee:

In regards to the flavour text of the Banshee, I feel like it's kind of contradicting itself. It says first elves usually do not succumb to the curse of undeath, but then lists several occasions where that is the case. It also says that they are intelligent, but cannot speak or understand language. I know what you mean, but I would rephrase it thus:

Banshees are a rare exception in the Ravenlands, created when an elf's ruby is shattered in their moment of death. The shards of the ruby, lodged in the elf's body, are easily corrupted and what remains is an empty husk, devoid of any intelligence. The regenerating energies of the ruby are just enough to keep a banshee from decaying, leaving them in a vampiric state. They mimic the memories they once possessed in a mockery of life, repeating the same sentences again and again(, in order to lure their victims into an untimely death). They stalk and attack the living, envious of the life that was taken from them, trying to regain what they have lost.

I left the last sentence out, because I found it to be a bit too much, but it can easily be added at the end. The "repeating the same sentences" part is just an example, but I feel it's evocative enough to have that scene in your head, where they lure a hapless victim with the same set of sentences in repeat, until their victims realize that something is wrong, at which point it is almost always too late.

I would also remove the Wits and Empathy from the banshee, due to its "unintelligence". (I would remove Empathy regardless of my changes, at least).

Shards of the elven ruby could be harvested from the banshee, but also...I don't know how averse you are to it, but "Undead Ichor/Ichor of Undeath".

Numbing Scream: "A scream, louder than anything you have ever heard, hurts your ears[...]" changed loader to louder, added comma between heard and hurts. I would also remove the queasy part. Doesn't really fit the tone, imho.

Numbing Scream: "Ever adventurer who can hear the banshee is affected by (a fear/an) attack with ten Base Dice(, damaging Agility)." I think I know why you wanted to attack Agility, so I left it in as an option. Usually I would categorize that attack as a normal fear attack, similar to the Unholy Roar! attack of the Death Knight, but I can see why that might not make too much sense.

Horrify: "[...] and unspeakable horrors fill their mind. [...]" fills -> fill

Steal Lifeforce: Remove the take before temporarily

Unholy Wail: "All creatures within LONG range, who can hear the banshee, suffer a fear attack with then Base Dice."

Touch of Demise: "[...] causing the target's flesh [...]" targets -> target's


Chimera:

"Individual Parts"
-> "[...] If they inflict 3 or more damage to an individual part, it becomes disabled [...]" - Restructured the sentence to sound better.
-> "Attacks made by disabled parts automatically fail." - Streamlined wording.

"Goring Charge" -> "[...] any creature in the zone the chimera left must make [...]" - Reworded so as to include creatures other than only the adventurers, like NPCs.

"Trample" -> "Make a move towards the enemy furthest away. Every creature in a zone the chimera moved through suffers an attack [...]" Changed the wording to include creatures other than only the adventurers. What bugs me a bit is, that clever fighters won't be standing in a line. No matter how much the chimera tramples, it couldn't possibly affect ALL creatures in all of the zones it tramples through. I'm pretty sure this will lead to discussions of "But I was standing off to the far right with my bow!". Maybe just "Arm's Length, the target and everyone in Arm's Length of the target" or "Arm's Length, the Target, and one other creature per zone in-between"?

Resources: Blood of the Chimera -> An acid-like fluid, which can be distilled into an alchemical compound/poison/solution/all-of-the-above. Needs a glass container, so as not to eat through it. I personally like the all-of-the-above, depending on how you treat the blood, as it kind of represents the essence of the chimera; three different things, mixed into one.


Demonic Husks => Rot Worms or Writhing Horror(s). The first is alluding to the wormlike muscles, the latter is probably a good name for how the host is going to look like.
 
wickermoon
Posts: 12
Joined: Tue 30 Aug 2022, 00:41

Re: Feedback to monsters, strongholds and artifacts needed!

Fri 02 Sep 2022, 07:22

False Hydra:

Description
-> "It continually erases all memories of itself and those it has eaten through its eerie song. [...] removed "all" ; though -> through
-> "[...] has always been so, husbands or wives will never have existed, but there are clues." comma instead of period after existed
-> "Those subjected to its song for too long, weeks or even months, will eventually succumb to its powers, unable to resist its song in any way. [...]" If I'm correct, there are no saves in FL. I guess it's a text taken from the original False Hydra concept which was created for D&D, if I'm not wrong. Saving throws make sense in D&D, not in FL, afaik.
-> The last sentence doesn't make too much sense for me. So what you want to say is that the false hydra can possibly regenerate heads, but only if it has eaten enough, and not instantly?

Heads:
-> "[...] two initiatives Monsters have for attacks, while the other heads sing." has-> have; "and" -> ", while"; sings -> sing

The Song:
"If at least one player succeeds the roll, have [...]" . Have -> , have

To be quite honest, I would rewrite the "The Song" mechanic. It's too...mechanical. There are ways to deal with the memory loss and the song of the hydra that don't require a roll (necessarily). The False Hydra is a powerful tool for and interesting, story-driven encounter. First of all, the players will have to realize that "all is not right in Denmark", and only then the PCs (not the players) can start to notice that something is going on. At least for me, the players are the subconscious of the PCs in this encounter. The False Hydra manipulates the memories of the PCs, but the subconscious cannot be tricked that easily. So the players will push their PCs to find clues. This is what some people might erroneously call metagaming, but in this instance it is exactly what you want. After the PCs realized that something is erasing memories, they can start to formulate a strategy to ward themselves from it. Be that cotton in the ears, deafness, or what-have-you (even simply running away). Solving all this through lucky rolls of some dice is robbing yourself of the experience of a False Hydra encounter.

Also, instead of having it look akin to a real hydra, I would change it to a more horrific aesthetic: https://external-preview.redd.it/6t7Nb2 ... 99d851aefd This is a pretty good example. Love it to bits.

Mind Wipe: Rephrase the attack to a weird kind of stun. People don't just not see the hydra, they are captivated by its song, losing the memory of what they wanted to do or even of the hydra itself. Anyone affected by the Mind Wipe (which is a creature that can hear the hydra's song) loses any of its actions for this turn. Their initiative also degrades by one (switching initiatives if that number has already been taken) every round they are affected by the attack, until it can't degrade any further. They will eventually see the hydra again and regain some focus (this is why the effect only lasts for one turn).

edit: Resources: False Hydra Voice Box. The source of their magical power (I mean...I dunno...why not?), it can be prepared and ground into a fine dust that can be used as an ingredient for potions/salves/weapon oils to "restore memories". -> 10 usages, adds 1 Willpower per usage OR Restores Wits/Empathy OR anyone attacked by a weapon with the weapon oil: If the attack hits and deals damage, make an insight check against potency X. On a fail, lose your remaining actions for this turn.

Sorry if this is such a big change, but the False Hydra is one of my favourite monsters and I am very passionate about how it should be utilized. ^^'
 
wickermoon
Posts: 12
Joined: Tue 30 Aug 2022, 00:41

Re: Feedback to monsters, strongholds and artifacts needed!

Fri 02 Sep 2022, 18:46

Hey, me again. In regards to your Crafting system:

Instead of adding two new levels to talents, have you thought about simply adding new talents with pre-requisites? How about a Master SwordsmithLeatherworker/Armoursmith talent, which lets you create rare/unique/magical swords/leather/metal armour? You would need to have the Smithing Talent at least on lvl 2 or even 3! It's kind of like new levels, but not really. :3
You could also expand the Crafting system to include monster ingredients, which you will need to create those magic weapons/armours/items. And you might also need very specific tools and a dedicated workshop for your stronghold, where you can keep those tools and machines. You might also need a new room to store the monster ingredients.

Instead of completely changing core mechanics, you have then just expanded several of those in an organic manner. Crafting, Talents and the Stronghold. Instead of pre-defined magical items, you can create a table of magical properties which can be applied to weapons/armour/items respectively. And the nice thing is: It's all pretty modular and optional. GMs can allow certain talents and disallow others, if they don't agree. They can scratch certain item enhancements off the table, or add new ones.

The problem with completely overhauling an old system is that you'll have to completely use the new system and cannot pick what you like. Modular design is a boon for GMs and would also encourage more people to try new stuff. I'd love me some supplements with optional roll tables, talents, skills, weapons, items, etc. I even love to have completely new systems, like the alchemy system, which is coming with the next expansion. I feel like all of the systems in FL are pretty solid, albeit maybe lacking here and there. But that is what modular expansions are for. I don't want a complete overhaul of the systems (which are working fine), I want to expand the content, to make it more interesting. At least, that would be my approach. Try to figure out the needs of the community and build on that.

I hope this input is helpful in some way. I would love to see such a system written down and codified. I'm too new to FL to really work on my own supplements, I simply lack the experience of what works, what doesn't and what needs to be improved. For now, FL is perfect for me. :)

edit: If you want that master crafter talent to be a bit more special and magic weapons to be way rarer, have the master crafter be reliant on specially prepared monster ingredients, which would need to be prepared by an alchemist. You connected two systems (alchemy and item crafting), even made magic weapons dependent on alchemists, without having to have the master crafter talent be directly dependant on it. I think that's pretty nice. :3
 
JohanR
Topic Author
Posts: 79
Joined: Tue 02 Mar 2021, 23:34

Re: Feedback to monsters, strongholds and artifacts needed!

Fri 02 Sep 2022, 19:21

Awesome! This is really great feedback!
Implemented most of your requests for changes straight away!

Undead Ichor - I'll gladly add it, but any ideas to what it does?

Numbing Scream - about targeting Agility. This was mostly so that not all encounters are the same? Giving some love to Sleight of Hands in the process felt like a bonus. Like a Fighter that did put a point here can go, "yay! It wasn't completely for nothing!".

Blood of the Chimera - Nice, will implement! Didn't have the time now right away, but will in the future!

Demonic Husks => Rot Worms or Writhing Horror(s). - Really cool names! I can perhaps even use both, that common people would call them Writhing Horrors, but that powerful entities like demons could call them Rot Worms.

False Hydra:
"If I'm correct, there are no saves in FL."
- I was thinking of the insight rolls you were allowed to make to resist its mind wipe. Could probably be better worded.

Changed head regeneration text to:
"It does not regenerate heads as quickly as a regular hydra and must consume a body in order to do so."
I just wanted to emphasize that it isn't exactly like a hydra? hence its only a "false" hydra? but I don't know.

I totally agree about the mechanics and that you as a GM do want the players to fail their first rolls.
I remade it so that it is impossible to initialize a fight from the get go and added some more leeway for the GM.
So it is perhaps better now. Maybe not perfect.. but could at least help and inexperienced GM?
My players had fun facing it when I GM:ed it. But I was lucky with the rolls, so good catch. It should require less luck with those to be a fun encounter now.
I'm still open to improvements!

About the image, I kind of agree. It is however very hard to find a false hydra image to buy for this "commercial"* purpose, or a public domain/commercially-OK creative commons licensed False Hydra. (* people can download Reforged Power without paying, but since they have the option to pay, I think it is very much considered as commercial)
So I started with drawing the False Hydra myself:
https://imgur.com/a/LRHjJsw
..but as I am pretty weak at drawing, I found this image that I could use and thought, cool, it is only the GM that sees it anyways and I guess these false hydras could look a bit different?
It simply felt a lot more professional than my image.

Mind Wipe: I reworded it, but this one I kept it as it was. I mean shouldn't the purpose be that people get enthralled by the song and starts to forget the hydra? I actually didn't put the emphasis on the song here.. if people would make themselves deaf and then be immune, then the fight immediately becomes a non-interesting and provides zero challenge.
So these hydras are perhaps different from the "common fantasy" version? I could kind of be okay, if this particular attack could be so magical, so that you could hear it even if deaf.

False Hydra Voice Box: I like the general idea. Perhaps there are memories inside? Could perhaps even be an "if prepared into an xyz and you consume it, there is enough for all, gain 1-2* extra xp from all the memories of the victims that starts to flood your mind, but also roll for a mental horror injury. Gain the lower amount of xp if you are ahead of the others and the higher amount if you are behind. No effect if it is consumed more than once."

--------------

PS. I added a new chapter I just wrote about strongholds in the GM booklet. Again, I have not have had the time to really read through it myself yet. The stronghold chapter is also not completed, it should at least include a chapter about new stronghold events (that are yet to be written, but could probably work on that next).
I also added a new artifact idea.

PS2: I gladly accept feedback like this. But if someone finds it easier to comment directly in the pdf or so, you could do that instead and send it to me via a PM on reddit or over mail (just PM me for mail adress to send to).
 
JohanR
Topic Author
Posts: 79
Joined: Tue 02 Mar 2021, 23:34

Re: Feedback to monsters, strongholds and artifacts needed!

Fri 02 Sep 2022, 19:45

Oh, I missed your comment about crafting.
My goal is to try to make things more modular.
Perhaps as two releases, one first to get things out, and then a second, more in modular-parts?

There are currently a lot of "modules" that are a bit stuck into one another and I will try to separate them, but some will probably still exist.
I therefore also thought of having rules that say something like: If you don't use Short Breaks, instead just read 'Short Breaks' as 'once per Quarter Day' if referenced in other chapters.
 
wickermoon
Posts: 12
Joined: Tue 30 Aug 2022, 00:41

Re: Feedback to monsters, strongholds and artifacts needed!

Fri 02 Sep 2022, 20:04

In regards to the artwork: The artwork was done by NisseLindblomArt, inspired by the original story of the False Hydra. You can find him on reddit. From what I gathered, the art seems to be open-license, but just drop him a quick message and he might reply. (https://www.reddit.com/user/NisseLindblomArt/)

To the Hydra: I think we're both imagining two different encounters. You're talking more about a single-fight encounter - or so it looks to me - while I am talking about more of an adventure site, with the False Hydra being the final boss of it. It's an "encounter" over several days (or even weeks!), where the players first have to find out what the actual problem is and why people behave so strangely, then have to formulate a strategy and prepare and finally have to fight the hydra. At least, I would add it as an adventure site. A very special village adventure site. :3 I guess that the actual battle mechanics would have to be revised as well then. Let me think about it some more. I think the False Hydra provides so much more material than just simply being a monster. Give me some time and I'll whip something up.

With that out of the way:

Undead Ichor - You could use it as an ingredient for a contact venom inflicting ice damage (and thus the cold condition), or as a poison to enslave others. Maybe even as a crafting component to create weapons which inflict cold damage (and thus the cold condition). I somehow associate Banshees with coldness.

Numbing Scream: I would still change the non-deaf adventurer to "creature that can hear the banshee", simply to be on the safe side of rules. Just as a stupid example, an unconscious character is not deaf, but can't hear the banshee. I also think it's perfectly fine for player characters to have an advantage for specific attacks when prepared accordingly. If you think it gives the characters an unfair advantage (wasting an attack), the banshee can notice that they're "immune" after the first attack and simply drop that attack from her attack pool in favour of another attack. But I find it quite engaging to allow players to sensibly counter the attack. I mean deaf characters already have that advantage and the characters are making themselves temporarily deaf anyway. :)

Demonic Husks: I love that they have two different names. I dig that!

False Hydra Voice Box: I love the XP idea. It's good, rewarding and unique. :) If you're making False Hydras super rare, have it grant a talent once to one character. I feel like the False Hydra is a very demanding encounter (look forward to my adventure site!) that could allow for such a unique reward. :)
 
JohanR
Topic Author
Posts: 79
Joined: Tue 02 Mar 2021, 23:34

Re: Feedback to monsters, strongholds and artifacts needed!

Sun 25 Sep 2022, 20:25

I will just call this a "Minor False Hydra" for now, and add that a major one can be a more complete adventure site, spanning several sessions.
And I will likley add some of the other stuff. Thank you.

I have now added an example of a more modular approach to the files (see the PC_ModularExample.pdf file), as several people have requested this. If any of you have any feedback around this, please do tell. It will cut everything into separate entities that you should be able to add on their own, but you might lose some consistency and readability from the old format.

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